Another Friday Fictioneers offering. Photo courtesy of John Nixon.
Marvel stared at the item from the back of the crowd. The rest of the bidders chattered excitedly.
“What a find!”
“Didn’t know there were any still around. Did you?”
“Thought they were banned…”
The legs twitched once. Marvel grinned. It was in pristine condition. This much excitement among people who knew what it was–or thought they did. He pushed his way through the crowd. It parted before him, whispering.
“I heard he was dead.”
“Four hundred thousand Krona,” Marvel said.
This particular soul was the perfect addition, a bargain. His collection at last complete.
40 thoughts on “Marvel’s Mansion of Macabre”
I actually like the ambiguity you had developed, until you stated it at the end “the imprisoned soul of joy and innocence…” The build up “Thought they were banned…” was brilliant. Perhaps re-write the last line, leaving it up the the readers imagination as to what exactly was bought here. Maybe go all cartoon villain “At last!” Marvel cried, rubbing his hands with glee. “My collection is complete!”
As usual, your edits are sublime. I left a bit of the original ending but changed it up—hopefully the ambiguity remains?
Less ambiguous than I would have made it, but I think you’ve actually done better than what I suggested. Yours is more ominous, less Snidely Whiplash.
Maybe I’ll have Yosemite Sam make a cameo in the next challenge—gleeful hand rubbing and gun-slangin’ galore.
The original would have been wonderful enough, but the edit was (sorry) pitch-perfect. Have you two ever collaborated? You might want to think on it.
We have collaborated in the sense that we have done some mutual edits/beta reading/feedback/what have you. I certainly benefit from Helena’s suggestions. Glad you liked the edit!
Oh, I like this one — a soul auction — what a clever idea! Very original take on the prompt.
Thank you! I almost skipped this one, but I’m glad I came up with something.
Thank you, Janet!
I really liked this too. It is completely original and fresh. The build up is great and I like the way you ended it.
Thank you, Linda. I’m glad it worked for you!
Crafty little story!
Thank you, Hannah! Great name by the way.
The killer piano. Pristine condition and only 400,000:- kr
Thanks for the link too!
Could you ask for a better deal? I think not!
That’s a unique take on the picture. Great job~
Thank you, David!
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Very creepy. I want to visit Marvel’s home out of some kind of morbid fascination.
I’m wondering what else he happens to have there, myself!
Oh boy, makes my take on the picture sound amateurish – but hey that’s a learning. Loved your story!
I’m still learning! I’m glad you liked it.
Biting wit and satire. Well done.
Thank you, Rochelle!
nicely done 🙂
Takes some doing to have a complete collection of souls–good story.
Soul music — very good
Haha that would have been a great title if I would have though of it!
That’s really good. Wasn’t expecting the ending (either version). (Does he keep the souls in a box or an album? I wonder.) I’m intrigued to know who Marvel is. The crowd seemed aware of him. Someone special.
Thank you! I was picturing more of a Madam Tussaud’s Waxwork Museum display for his collection
Skip this one? We are certainly glad you didn’t!
Thank you! I am, too. I guess some of them just don’t come as easily!
I would imagine it’s true for all of us. I know it is for me.